When Did You Start Feeling Married Instead of Together?

My husband and I have not been married very long, but people keep asking us “does it feel any different now that you are married”? We moved out of the country together before we got engaged and have had a joint checking account for a while. We have cats and had lived together for two years previously. What exactly is supposed to change?

I think when I imagined our wedding in my head, there was supposed to be some sort of life altering change after we exchanged rings. However, right after our ceremony both of us agreed that there wasn’t any change and that we are still just us and it seemed a little anti-climactic.

We keep using “husband” and “wife” when addressing each other at home to be cute, but there still doesn’t seem to be any difference in our relationship. A co-worker of Jason’s said that is a good thing since we are already so close. We are completely happy together, still spend time together, still go to the comic book store together on Wednesdays – this is not something I am worried about – just have a general wondering about.


To any married folks reading this:

When did you and your spouse start feeling married instead of just together?

Was it after a certain amount of time? After a certain life event? Ever?


2 thoughts on “When Did You Start Feeling Married Instead of Together?

  1. Yolanda Joy

    I think it might more be the opposite – maybe you guys felt “married” before you actually were married. The origin of marriage meant that you started living together and having sex, which are obviously huge changes – but you guys had already experienced those changes having lived together previously. So I think you’ve probably been feeling “married” for a while now already! 🙂 It’s a good thing you’re so close, and it hasn’t changed that!

    1. mindymwm Post author

      Thank you Yolanda,

      Maybe you are right. I hadn’t really thought about it like that! I guess I was just anticipating something different since this has just felt like us for such a long time (which is in no way a bad thing). Jason doesn’t think we will feel married until we have kids or buy a house or some milestone like that.


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